MONDAY BYTES — August 3, 2015
We all experience fears and self-doubt: it’s human nature. Fear and doubt can prompt us to be alert when we are in danger and to prepare well for an important event.
But fears and doubts can also prevent us from pursuing the projects that we dream of and from reaching out to people we’d like to connect with. This is how fear can create a kind of glass ceiling in our performances and lives.
I’m a huge fan of Seth Godin and in a recent post he speaks to the heart of confronting fears:
I’m afraid of that
If you can say this out loud, when you’ve been holding back, avoiding your confrontation with the truth, you will free yourself to do something important. Saying it takes away the power of the fear.
On the other hand, if you say it 8 times or 11 times or every time, you’re using the label to reinforce your fear, creating an easy escape hatch to avoid doing something important. Saying it amplifies the fear.
The brave thing is to find the unspeakable fear and speak it. And to stop rehearsing the easy fears that have become habits.
In working one on one with musicians, I often find that fear and self-esteem are lurking issues that prevent progress. This can manifest itself in a reluctance to network, or in procrastinating working on one’s promotional materials.It’s easy to become stuck when we feel “less than” because on some level we believe believe we’re unworthy, that we don’t have what it takes.
As Seth says, if you can acknowledge the feeling, then you have a handle on confronting and challenging these self-defeating beliefs. Then the “trick” is to do the work, do the networking, the promotional materials, and sort out the truth about what you actually have to offer so you can change your self-talk. Changing your internal messages will change your behavior and this will change your career trajectory.
I am inspired by the musicians I work with, by seeing them gain confidence and clarity of their purpose and value. When musicians stand in their strengths and communicate well what they offer, that’s when the career advancement starts to take off!
Challenge for the week: Be on the lookout for what you have been avoiding, procrastinating, or excluding as an option. Big or small. Find the fear and name it. See what happens.
As always, I’d love to hear what works for you and what you’d like to get more help with!
PS: Want more? Put the byte on fear HERE.
For info on working with me: details are HERE.
Monday Bytes archived posts are HERE.
Dream Big, Plan Smart, Live Well!
